Marriage

If you are thinking of getting married at St Anne’s, that is great news. But there are some things you need to know.

One or both of you need to be a baptised Catholic and resident in St Anne’s parish or attending Mass here regularly. You must give at least 6 months notice of your intention to marry. If either of you has been married before, even if that was not in a church, you should speak to the priest at the earliest opportunity, to check if a marriage in church will be possible.

Marriage Preparation

Preparation for marriage does not just mean preparation for the day of your wedding. Preparations begin with an engaged couples course. You will be invited to come together and join other couples in thinking about your relationship and why you have asked to be married in church. Fr Chris can give you information about the various options for taking part in a marriage preparation course. After the course you will need to meet with Fr. Chris a couple of times to complete the necessary paperwork and plan the wedding service. It is important that you make contact with the priest 3 months before the date of your wedding to allow sufficient time for planning and to check that all the necessary paperwork is in place.

Civil Requirements

You need to visit the Register Office (Manchester or Tameside, depending on where you live) to give ‘notification of your intention to marry’. You can do this up to 12 months before, but you must do it at least 28 days before the wedding. After 21 days you will be issued with a ‘Marriage Schedule’. It is important that this schedule is given to Fr. Chris directly, as the wedding cannot go ahead without it. For this reason, please hand it to Fr. Chris and don’t post it through the letterbox! A fee is charged by the Register Office. The parish has its own Authorised Person, who witnesses your marriage for civil purposes. There is no need for you to ask the registrar to come to the Church.

Costs and fees

There is a set charge for the registration of your marriage on the day. There may also be charges for an organist, singer etc. There is no set Church fee, but it is customary to make a donation to the parish. Considering the various meetings with the priest, the resources used and the arrangements made by the church we suggest an amount proportionate to other wedding expenses.

Pope Francis’ 6-point Plan for those preparing for Marriage

 (1) Build love: love, said Francis, must be more than mere emotion or psycho-physical state. To become something solid, it must be built in the same way a house is built. ‘And we build a house together, not alone’ he said.

 (2) It’s not about forever: marriage is about more than duration, the Pope made clear. ‘A marriage succeeds, not just because it lasts, its quality is also important’.

 (3) Remember to be courteous, grateful, and apologetic: ‘Gratitude is an important sentiment. Do we know how to say thank you? Saying sorry is important too.  In general, we are ready to accuse others and to justify ourselves. It is an instinct that lies at the origins of many disasters. Let us learn to recognise our mistakes and to apologise’. No couples should ever end a day angry with one another; being at peace with one another is the secret that preserves love.

 (4) It’s not just about the wedding: ‘Some people’, said Pope Francis, ‘are more concerned about the party, the photographs, the clothes, the cars and the flowers. These are important, but only if they are able to indicate the true reason for your joy: the Lord’s blessing upon your love.’

 (5) There’s no such thing as perfect: ‘The perfect family does not exist’, the Pope said, ‘And nor does the perfect husband or the perfect wife. In a long marriage, both partners have to put up with each other; in other words, it’s about give as well as take for both parties’.

(6) Marriage is about helping one another to grow. ‘The husband has a duty to make his wife more of a woman and wife has the task of making her husband more of a man… this is called growing together. Always act so that the other person will grow…’